FADE IN:

INT. RIBON HOUSE - DAY

PAMELA RIBON has an idea for a blog post. She texts her friend, AB CHAO, to tell her ALL about it.

PAM
What about an entry on how to make a stranger a best friend? You have a gift for making someone feel they need you in their lives, even when they are Greg Berlanti.

INT. CHAO HOUSE - SAME

AB CHAO hears her phone ding, checks it. She responds. A furious back-and-forth ensues.

AB
Um, I don't know how that happens.

PAM
Hahahahahahahaaaaa! HA HA HA. HAHA.

AB
For serious, I don't! I never contacted Greg before he wrote me.

PAM
I thought he asked you for the TWoP interview.

AB
I did, after he emailed me a bunch of times.

PAM
Oh.

AB
Besides, what am I gonna say? "Use straws as chopsticks." "Introduce yourself." "Hate rocking chair stores." "Be mad at Wayne Brady."

PAM
Actually, yes on the first two.

AB
Send me a list of five things that made you want to be friends with me, and I'll try to figure out some kind of theory. The first two are already done.

PAM
...and that would be an example what I am talking about. I'm busy, lady! I can't do homework.

AB
I HATE YOU.

PAM
FORGET IT.

AB
(Waits 30 seconds)

PAM
FINE. "Dewit and dewit right." When you write it up, don't forget that "I hate you" is step 4.

AB
Obviously. I'll expect step 5 by the morning.

FIN

Posted
AuthorAB Chao